What to Say to Someone Who Just Lost a Loved One

It is never easy to know what to say when someone close to us suffers a loss. Whether it is the death of a loved one, or something else that has caused them great grief, we often find ourselves at a loss for words. But sometimes, the simplest things can be the most comforting. 

What to Say to Someone Who Just Lost a Loved One Quotes

“I’m so sorry for your loss.”

This simple statement conveys both sympathy and support. It lets the person know that you care about them and are there for them during this difficult time.

“Your loved one will always be remembered.”

Whether you share fond memories of the deceased or simply express how much they meant to you, letting the bereaved know that their loved one will not be forgotten can bring some measure of comfort.

“I’ll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.”

Letting the grieving person know that you will be thinking of them can provide some small measure of solace during this tough time. While grief is an incredibly difficult experience, one small way of providing comfort to a loved one in pain is letting them know that you are with them in spirit. Maintaining contact allows for shared memories to be celebrated or for new ones to be made. A simple gesture of compassion can make all the difference. Showing that you care and are thinking of them with patience and understanding can more than anything else assure someone that they are not alone during these darkest of days.

What Not to Say to Someone Who Just Lost a Loved One

While there are many things that can be helpful to say when someone loses a loved one, there are many others that aren’t appropriate to say. These things tend to diminish the real pain and loss that someone is experiencing, and they simply aren’t helpful. Some examples of things not to say to someone who just lost a loved one are:

• They’re in a better place now.
• God needed another angel.
• At least they lived a good life/long life.
• It was their time.
• You’re strong, you’ll get through this.
• Time heals all wounds.
• They would want you to be happy/smile again.
• Everything happens for a reason.
• It was meant to be.
• You should be grateful.
• God never gives us more than we can handle.
• At least they’re no longer suffering.
• At least you have other family / people in your life.
• They’re in a better place now.

Tips for What to Say to Someone Who Just Lost a Loved One

1. Acknowledge their pain. It is never easy to experience loss, especially of a loved one. To express our deep sympathies in these dark moments, we can offer up simple words that let them know we see their pain. This can help those who are grieving to feel acknowledged and understood. We may not have the right words to take away their pain and sorrow, but with a considerate tone of voice, our words of understanding can provide some form of comfort in an otherwise difficult time.
2. Share a memory of the person they lost. If someone you care about has just lost a loved one, it can be hard to know what to say or do. You could start by expressing your sympathy and letting them know they have your support. Additionally, sharing a memory of the person they’ve lost might help them feel some comfort in remembering their happy times together. Letting your friend or family member know that the person they’ve lost will not be forgotten can remind them that there is still joy to be found in the special moments they shared together. Phrases such as “I’ll never forget a time when…” can be a great place to start.
3. Offer to help in any way you can. It can be devastating when someone you care about suffers a loss, and it is often difficult to know what to do or say in the face of such a tragedy. It is important to keep in mind that simply being there is often all that is needed. Losing a loved one can be extremely hard, so if someone close to you has experienced this pain, let them know you are there for them and offer your support in any way it may help. The simple phrase of “if there’s anything I can do to help, please let me know” can go a long way. If they don’t reach out with any particular needs, simply offering to cook dinner, help with chores, or providing a listening ear can make a world of difference in giving support during such trying times.
4. Let them know you’re there for them and are thinking of them. Telling them “I’ll be thinking of you and if you need to talk, I’m here” can be a supportive gesture. Reminding them that you care can help immensely, even if it doesn’t take away the pain of their loss or make the situation any better. It is important to let them know that they are not alone and that you are available to listen and be present should they wish to talk. Be sure to ask how they are feeling as well, so they feel heard and understood. Even offering to keep in touch via text or phone calls can make a huge difference in lightening the loneliness someone may feel when grieving.

Grief is hard, but friends and family don’t have to go through it alone. If someone you know is struggling after losing a loved one, take the time to talk to them. Acknowledge their pain, share a memory of the person they lost, and offer to help in any way you can. Let them know that they’re not alone and that you’re there for them. Just being there for someone can make all the difference.